Do you Believe that something can be worse than dying?

I believe that there are only a couple of things that are worse than dying. These things to me would have to be the worse things that could ever happen. My mom would die!!!! That would be devastating. YA NO!!! It would get me to the point of suicide. I wouldn’t know what to do. I’m sorry for anybody that has to deal with there mom dying. I terrified of my mom dying. She has got me through at least 18 years of my life. She is the one that gave me life. Thank you momma!

Another thing is losing my kid to anything. Have him taken away from me, like by the state, kidnapped, death anything. It would crush me. I would also think about suicide. There is nothing more important to me than my kid, my mom, and my brother, and his family.

These things are about it. There aren’t many things that I think are worse than dying. Well if my family would actually claim me there would be more. There should probably be more that is more important.

Dang Rumors

I HATE RUMORS!!! Usually rumors that are untrue spread so quickly because people over exaggerate them. They tell everybody, but the truth people don’t necessarily care about the truth.

Rumors can affect individuals and communities in many different ways. For it to effect individuals it’s quite easy, it gets back to the person it started with and they are like, “I told the person I did tell not to tell,” or that’s not what happened or something of that nature. In communities it can start protest and fights and just stress. Like say a business said that they are thinking about teasing things down and people protest because they heard that they were going to tear it down for sure. Then that starts stuff that don’t need to be started.

Rumors are a total waste of my and everybody’s time. It hurts peoples feelings. It’s just stupid, why cause drama? It’s not worth it, just let it go. WHO CARES???? Defiantly not me, I got so much better things to do with my words and what I do with my life. Geez people need to grow up! How hard is it to be like cool, ok, and just forget about it? Not very hard!!!

People in my opinion need to be nice unless it’s absolutely a have to. Like say cheating, or talking crap then ya go for it. Of course I’m not going to tell people what to day, but I hope I can influence people to make right decisions.

Suicide

My thoughts on suicide are that it’s personal, like it has to do with your emotions, feelings, and way you think. It does happen quite often in this world. Trust me, I have tried to commit suicide a couple of times. I have tried pulling the trigger. I have tried drowning myself.

I was in some bad times in my life. It was my first time trying it with the gun. I just got my 9mm and I put it to my head and I hesitated. I couldn’t do it. What stopped me was my girlfriend and my mom. I closed my eyes and I pictured their faces.

When I tried drowning myself I went boating but I didn’t go on the boat. I just swam, I would swim as far as I could in the middle of Red Fleet Lake, and then I would swim as deep as I could then just sit there. I would be so far down that I wouldn’t be able to swim up fast enough. I could never do it. I always saw my mom’s and my girlfriends face. I thought I was a screw up but their faces brought me up . I thank God everyday for them. Thank You!

I know a couple people that have tried and succeeded. My uncle is one of them. I was very close to him. I found out he hung himself in his shed. My aunt found him hanging in the middle of the shed. I miss him so much. Rest in Peace Jason.

Suicide in my opinion can be prevented. It’s up to the people that are thinking about it. In suicide you have a choice to live or die. I’m a perfect example, I prevented it.

In my opinion I don’t think anybody is to blame in suicide. It’s all personal thoughts and actions. People can add to it, but people can’t make suicide happen. Everybody has a choice to live in suicide. I just hope people make the right decision. Nobody should have to go through suicide or suicide in a family.

Momma

My parents are crazy; well my mom is. She is awesome, she is way short. She is the best mom anybody could ask for. She has red hair. My mom is 5’1 so she is short. I probably resemble my mom the most. I can’t stand my dad, but who cares. I can’t stand my dad because he doesn’t want me in his life. He told my brother and me that he wishes that we would get hit by a dump truck, and that we were both a mistake. I have just said “I’m not going to even worry bout him, if he don’t want me in his life then I don’t want him in mine.” I don’t need my dad, when I have my baby I’m going to be a better dad than him. He has taught me how not to raise and love my kids. He has taught me to not abandon my kids if they have some kind of problem, such as a drug problem. Also he has taught me to keep my kids close as possible unlike him.